Recommendations for working as parents of preschool children. Recommendations from a psychologist to parents of a preschooler on raising a child. Educational games for intelligence

Being good parents is not an easy task, which is why millions of couples study various books and manuals on how to properly treat their child. By applying these 12 parenting tips, many moms and dads have already achieved success. So what is their secret? What rules do they follow to create harmonious relationships with their children?

1. It’s normal to have extreme patience.

As often happens, children do not pay attention to their parents’ comments, and sometimes even violently resist their instructions. When the critical moment comes, mothers and fathers give up and give in to the child. By doing this, they want to maintain peace, show patience, and want to be “good parents.” But thus parents lose their authority– if children push hard, they will get what they want under pressure.

It is important to remember that anyone can lose patience, we are all human and everyone can lose their temper, there is nothing wrong with that. Containing anger and irritation is actually difficult, especially if children do everything as if out of spite. The child must understand that you do not like this behavior; you cannot follow the lead of your son or daughter. Allow your emotions to manifest themselves, rather than hiding them inside yourself, let your child and yourself understand that you do not agree with the situation. The accumulated negativity will subsequently find a way out, only then can all family members suffer, and children most of all.

2. Teach your child to enjoy a toy, and not count its price.

When purchasing an expensive toy for a child, parents often ask them to treat it with special care, constantly reminding them of how much it costs. But for a child this does not matter, because he cannot yet evaluate things and objects based on their monetary costs.

Understanding the value of money will come to him later, and when children are small, they are equally interested in playing with both simple trinkets and expensive toys. Even playing with a simple piece of paper or a bag sometimes seems more exciting to them than with a radio-controlled helicopter.

3. Punishment is a manifestation of love

Do you consider yourself a bad parent if you have to punish your children? When your son or daughter does stupid things, you have the right to be angry with them, and therefore to punish them. Reprimand is a loving measure; without it, a child will not learn to see the boundaries of what is permitted.

Thanks to timely punishment, children begin to understand that every action they take has consequences., they grow up to be people who know how to take responsibility for their actions. Remember that being good parents does not mean at all that you need to turn a blind eye to your child’s bad behavior and allow him everything.

4. Don't be afraid to refuse

How nice it is to answer affirmatively to all the children’s requests, because they are so sincerely happy! But saying "yes" all the time can lead to relationship problems years later. A child who is not accustomed to refusals will begin to demand more and more over time, what should parents do then?? Will they be able to fulfill all the whims and requests of a teenager?

Don’t be afraid to refuse children who are still young; show firmness when necessary, saying your firm “no.” When you refuse a child for the first time, you may encounter resistance in the form of tears, whims, hysterics, but do not give in, if the decision is made, stick to your word. Once you give in to your child’s whims, it will subsequently become even more difficult to refuse him something else.

5. Raise children to be independent

By not trusting your children to do small tasks around the house, by doing all the work for them, you will achieve only one thing - when they grow up, they will not be able to do basic things, such as warm up their own food or wash the dishes. It is necessary to teach a child to be independent from early childhood. Ask them to help collect toys and wipe off dust.

If your daughter wants to wash a plate, allow her, even if the result is not the best, still praise the girl for her initiative and effort. Never tell your child that he won’t succeed; don’t do the work for him. Such words will discourage you from taking on any business at all in the future. By doing this, parents do not give their children the opportunity to develop independence.

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6. Don’t deprive yourself of the right to rest

The responsibility of raising children is a job that requires constant effort and attention, and it is also a 24/7 job. You can’t quit her job, and you can’t get a vacation either. But moms and dads still need to rest to regain their strength. Sometimes it’s worth taking a so-called day off.

Teach your child to understand your needs for sleep and rest.. Explain that while mom is lying down, the children can do something interesting - draw, make a figure from plasticine, or just watch cartoons. Teach them to play quietly and not make numerous requests to their mother when she is resting. However, observe moderation - children should not be left for long without adult supervision, you will be rested, but the child will be left to his own devices.

7. Form the habit of eating right from an early age

Adequate and proper nutrition at an early age is what you need to teach your children, because human health depends on it. If you choose healthy foods yourself, let your child adopt this habit from you. It is a mistake to believe that while children are small, they can eat everything - sweets and chips. This does not mean that kids should eat only cereals and vegetables, but you should not include fast food or other unhealthy foods in their daily diet.

Grandmothers pose the greatest danger here - they constantly think that their grandchildren are hungry, offering them either pies or pancakes. Tactfully but strictly explain to elderly relatives that by showing excessive care and love for children, they harm their health.

8. Having children is not the end of life.

Being parents does not mean giving up your own interests and entertainment. Of course, moms and dads don’t have as much time to meet friends and go to the movies as they used to before children were born. But you cannot completely deprive yourself of some kind of emotional relief. It is important to learn to combine parental responsibilities with your interests, to find a middle ground.

9. Take an interest in your child’s life

By showing interest in what your baby is doing and hobbies, you are building a solid foundation for good relationships in the future. In early childhood, a child can enthusiastically tell you about Pokemon, Peppa Pig and other favorite characters, new toys and cartoons.

Delving into the words of children, getting to know their world, you become close friends. When the baby grows up, he will begin to share with you more adult problems and hobbies, knowing that you will not brush him off, but will support and listen.

10. Parents need to be able to ask for forgiveness.

Basing your upbringing on the principle “mom is always right” and stubbornly not admitting your mistakes is fundamentally wrong. Everyone makes mistakes - both children and adults. And since you teach your child to ask for forgiveness for his misdeeds, be so kind as to follow your own rules and also admit your guilt.

Yes, it can be difficult, but there is no shame in it. Such objective observance of the rules in your family will allow you to build a harmonious and warm relationship with your child on equal terms.

11. The limit has come - take a time out

There are situations when the atmosphere heats up almost to the limit, when emotions, replacing each other, overwhelm and are ready to spill out. In this case, it’s worth taking a time out - ask your grandmother or friend to take the children for at least an hour or two to give yourself the opportunity to restore calm.

If you feel that the peak of emotional overexcitation is coming, stop, go to another room at least for 20 minutes, take a shower, think about the upcoming trip to the sea. This way you will avoid many conflict situations and learn to remain calm.

12. Your children are the best in the world.

For parents, their child, even an adult (namely, he will be a child for you both at 5 and at 45) will always be the best, most beautiful, smart, sweet and kind. Don't be afraid of your feelings, but show them as often as possible. Some mothers and fathers believe that excessive love and care will only spoil their children, so they begin to criticize them. Do not deprive your child of support and tenderness, because they are more effective than any educational measures.

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Children are the most valuable thing in everyone's life. We try to raise them as best we can. But sometimes situations arise when mom and dad don’t know what to do correctly in a given situation. In such a situation, advice from a psychologist to parents can help solve the most pressing problems. What should you pay attention to when raising your child?

What is education - the opinion of Yu. Gippenreiter

How to raise a child without harming him?

Your child is unique. He is not like anyone, including you. The child is not your copy, so you cannot demand that he implement the life script you wrote.

Your child is an independent person, with his own strengths, weaknesses, abilities, desires and preferences. Give him the right to choose in everything. Let him make decisions himself at crucial moments. Focus on his strengths and positive qualities. Accept him as he is.

Don't be shy about your love for your child and showing it. There is no need to be afraid that you will “fall in love” with him.

He should feel a reliable support in your life and understand that you will support him in any situation. Try to take your child on your lap as often as possible, look into his eyes, hug and kiss him. Affection is the best method of encouragement.

At the same time, do not allow permissiveness in education. It is necessary that your family has some boundaries and prohibitions that you need to strictly adhere to.

Before you punish, stop and think about whether the child really deserves punishment now. After all, you can first try to resolve the issue with the help of affection and requests. If the punishment is truly motivated, then it is necessary to clearly explain the reason for the punishment.

Don't forget what a huge role play plays in a child's life. It is in game moments that you can convey to your baby everything he needs to know. It is through the game that you can tell your child about life values ​​and priorities. The game helps children and parents understand each other better.

You must not forget about the importance of communicating with your child; try to do this as often as possible. Teach your child to express their feelings and emotions. This will help the child understand other people and his own behavior.

The style of your relationship with your child affects not only the child’s behavior, but also his mental health. If your child feels negative towards himself, this can cause hidden aggression.

Remember that how you communicate with your child depends on his ability to empathize with others and feel emotions, both positive and negative. When communicating with a child, remember that the communication process requires understanding your interlocutor, his feelings and emotions.

The most common mistakes parents make in raising children

Never compare your child to anyone else. This will only have negative consequences, as it can cause psychological trauma to your little man. Also, this behavior of adults contributes to the development of negativism, selfishness and envy.

How to make communication between parents and children effective?

In the process of communicating with your child, make every effort to ensure that the child understands that you understand his emotional state, mood, and feelings associated with the situation that he is telling you about. All that is necessary for this is to listen carefully to the child, and then unobtrusively repeat in your own words what the child told you. This way you will give your child the opportunity to sort out his feelings, he will understand that you hear and listen to him.

If a child talks through his problem with you, this is already a successful start to getting rid of it.

When you communicate with a child, try to carefully monitor his gestures and facial expressions. Sometimes children don’t want to upset us and say that everything is fine. But if you take a closer look at their non-verbal way of expressing their feelings (the chin trembles, the eyes are shiny or “wet”), then you can immediately guess about the child’s true feelings.

Try to support your child in any situation, even without words. To do this, you can use all possible tactile methods: a smile, a hug, a wink, a nod of the head, a look in the eyes.

You may not be prepared to answer every question. But try not to answer your child’s questions in a mocking tone, because he can give you away better than your words and eyes.

When maintaining a conversation, you need to demonstrate your interest in the topic of your communication. You can ask the following questions: “Wow! And what happened then?”, “Oh, how interesting! Tell me…"

When you spend time with your child, use games that are familiar to you from childhood. For example, to develop fine motor skills, sort out buckwheat. To develop coordination, allow your child to climb trees. In order to develop speech and horizons, talk to your child. In the process of communication, many subtle psychological problems can be solved.

Help your child relieve muscle and nervous tension. This can be done through massage or even light body rubbing. If it is not possible to do the above procedures, just hug the child, pat him on the head and tell him how much you love him.

Affection and hugs are very important for a child

Praising a child - how to do it correctly?

The most important thing to remember about praise is that every child needs to be supported and praised. All the child’s actions should begin with a feeling of success, which should manifest itself not only at the end, but also at the beginning of any undertaking. The task of parents is to create conditions for a feeling of success, the joy of searching, and overcoming.

However, parents are faced with the question of what and how to praise their child correctly, what actions or features of his personality need to be emphasized and focused on them. The main answer here is not what to praise for, but how to do it.

Your sincere approval and boasting can work truly miracles. This will give the child the opportunity to believe in himself and his capabilities.

Why shouldn't you praise? First of all, one cannot praise something that is already easy for a child or given by nature. It is necessary to praise for the work and effort that the child has made. If you simply approve of the presence of certain abilities, then this is unlikely to bring any positive result for the development of the child. On the contrary, this style of communication can only do harm, especially if it is repeated often.

If you constantly praise your child unnecessarily, he will get used to it and will constantly expect and demand praise. This can cause problems in communicating with people around him. Since the child will be confident in his complete superiority over others. This is fraught with manifestations of egocentrism and the formation of inflated and inadequate self-esteem. He will constantly expect admiration and praise from others. If the praise stops, this will cause psychological discomfort in the child, which in the future will lead to the appearance of envy, petty touchiness, jealousy of others’ success, suspicion and other qualities.

It is extremely undesirable to praise a child for what is easy for him in front of those for whom it is practically impossible or very difficult to do.

This can seriously traumatize the child’s psyche. This can lead to decreased motivation to do things. Such an unfair opposition will not cause a desire to follow the example of someone who is unfairly praised. On the contrary, it can only cause feelings of oppression and resentment.

You cannot praise too often when there is no obvious need for it. At the same time, praise is devalued, causing a feeling of cheap success. There is a thoughtless attitude towards what adults say.

Praise should be for a specific action, for the child’s achievements, and not for the child’s personal qualities. Otherwise, you can develop inflated self-esteem and high self-esteem. If in the future the child sees that those around him are not so enthusiastic about him, this will lead to the appearance of neuroses and hysterical character traits.

Time flies extremely quickly, and soon your child will become a first grader. Is he ready for school? How much knowledge should a preschooler have by this time? What is more important: knowledge or psychological readiness? There are a lot of questions!

All preschool children are different. Some go to kindergarten, learn letters and numbers, and attend classes with a speech therapist and psychologist. Others have never been to the garden, and their social circle is limited to the parents and children of their friends. Still others, without attending kindergarten, manage to study in various early development centers, clubs and sections. Whichever of these categories your child belongs to, if there is at least six months left before school, then everything can be fixed!

Recommendations from psychologists to parents of preschoolers very often boil down to the fact that the main criteria are the ability to concentrate attention for more than 30 minutes, as well as perseverance. If in kindergarten children are familiar with the rules of behavior during classes, then for children who do not attend preschool institutions, sitting at a desk for more than 15-20 minutes is a difficult test. Even the most interesting topic is not able to hold the attention of a preschooler for more than 10-15 minutes. The best solution is to attend short-term groups at school. Unfortunately, such groups do not exist in every school. If you do not have the opportunity to enroll your child in an early development center, then arrange impromptu lessons at home. Instruct your child, for example, to draw a picture, but try to make sure that while drawing he does not get distracted and sits in one place. Another piece of advice for parents of preschoolers: when studying at home, try to make sure your child does what you assign him, and not what he wants. That is, let him draw a tree, as you said, and not a typewriter or the sun.

Do not forget that most mothers do not have special education, so many things necessary to prepare for school may be missed.

These qualities are no less important for a preschooler than knowledge of letters and numbers. A child must be able to take care of himself: comb his hair, dress, and seek advice from adults. In addition, at this age, children have information about their place of residence, surname, names of parents and place of their work, seasons, age.

Before school, parents should take care of... Such “training” is best done in the form of exciting games. Count birds and people on a walk, pay attention to the colors of cars, and at home, after a walk, ask your child how many white cars, for example, he saw. Reading and memorizing poems is great, and if the child knows a lot of them by heart, ask them to recite a poem on a specific topic (about mom, about friends, etc.).

In the memo for parents of preschoolers, attention should also be paid to the development of the child’s logic. To do this, you can use a series of pictures or figures, where one or two elements will be superfluous (a vegetable among fruits or a living creature among objects).

Advice for parents of preschoolers

Time flies extremely quickly, and soon your child will become a first-grader.

Is he ready for school?

How much knowledge should a preschooler have by this time?

What is more important: knowledge or psychological readiness?

There are a lot of questions!

All preschool children are different:

Some go to kindergarten, learn letters and numbers, and attend classes with a speech therapist and psychologist.

Others have never been to the garden, and their social circle is limited to the parents and children of their friends.

Still others, without attending kindergarten, study in various early development centers, clubs and sections.

Whichever of these categories your child belongs to, if there is at least six months left before school, then everything can be fixed!
Psychological aspect

If in kindergarten children are familiar with the rules of behavior during classes, then for children who do not attend preschool institutions, sitting for 15-20 minutes is a difficult test. Even the most interesting topic is not able to hold the attention of a preschooler for more than 10-15 minutes.

The best solution is to attend short-term groups at school. Unfortunately, such groups do not exist in every school.

If you do not have the opportunity to enroll your child in an early development center, then arrange impromptu lessons at home. Instruct your child to draw a picture, but try to make sure that while drawing, he does not get distracted and sits in one place.

Another piece of advice for parents of preschoolers: when studying at home, try to make sure your child does what you assign him, and not what he wants. That is, let him draw a tree, as you said, and not a typewriter or the sun.

Do not forget that most mothers do not have special education, so many things necessary to prepare for school may be missed.
Important skills

These qualities are no less important for a preschooler than knowledge of letters and numbers. A child must be able to take care of himself: comb his hair, dress, and seek advice from adults. At this age, children should have information about their place of residence, surnames, names of parents and their place of work, seasons, age.

Before school, parents need to take care of the development of your child's memory. Such “training” is best done in the form of exciting games. Count birds and people while walking, pay attention to the colors of cars. At home, after a walk, ask your child how many white cars, for example, he saw.

Reading and memorizing poems is great, but if the child knows a lot of them by heart, ask them to recite a poem on a specific topic (about mom, about friends, etc.)

Parents of preschoolers should pay special attention to the development of the child’s logic. To do this, you can use a series of pictures or figures, where one or two elements will be superfluous: a vegetable among fruits, or a living creature among objects.

To summarize, useful information for parents of preschoolers is as follows:
- train the child’s memory and attention;
- pay attention to the development of logic, motor skills, perception and perseverance;
- use general developmental exercises;
- conduct classes in a playful way.

Remember, the main rule for parents of preschoolers is to:
- instill in the child an interest in acquiring new knowledge,
- teach him not to be afraid of bad grades,
- find a common language with classmates.
After all, for you he has always been and will be the best and most beloved!

Vorobyova Tatyana Nikolaevna
Recommendations for parents of older preschoolers

Dear parents, in activities the child learns to make decisions and navigate in certain situations. In order for your child to be independent and proactive, you must follow the following recommendations:

Allow your child to make decisions independently, take initiative, and complete tasks without your help;

Try to take less care of your child;

Consult with him more often, discuss emerging issues, contradictions, problems that personally concern the preschooler and general problems in the family;

Let him observe the activities of adults (he can be given feasible and not difficult tasks);

A child can be directly involved in joint activities with an adult;

The activity of an adult in relation to a child may consist in the transmission of individual facts and cultural samples;

Help your child independently master the stages of a particular type of activity, gradually entrusting the implementation of the entire technology of the process;

Use the subject environment in joint activities that surround the daily life of the family (wash the dishes, tidy up the house, put things away after a walk, collect shoes);

Praise your child even for the smallest successes;

Analyze failures, find out the reasons together, but do not judge or give harsh assessments;

Offer your child different ways to complete the task, discuss options for use.

Dear parents, motivation depends on your participation! Motivational readiness for school plays one of the most important roles in shaping the personality of a future student. How can parents help their children? In order for your child to make decisions independently and show interest in new things, you must follow the following recommendations:

1. Every day you need to ask: “How are you? What was new, what was interesting?” Make such conversations a habit, and the child will feel his parents' interest in his affairs.

2. Offer to help with some errand or task. For example, discuss the progress of work, conclusions, what may not work.

3. Learn through activities with children. Go to interesting places, read, choose and buy books together, sign up for a city or regional library. Discuss what you read with your children: what did you remember in the work? What did you like and what didn’t you want to change or think about?

4. Try to correctly assess your child’s knowledge, skills and achievements. Never compare him with other preschoolers or children of relatives or acquaintances (because of this, the preschooler’s self-esteem decreases and he stops believing in himself and his strengths).

5. Make the assumption that children gain new experience from mistakes, trying to avoid them in the future.

6. Try to be an example for your child of a person who constantly reads, studies and strives to realize himself.

7. Tell your child about your school life, focusing on what the school gave you, how it helped you, what difficult situations there were, how you got out of them?

Dear parents, it is necessary to remember that communication allows a child to find not only people with similar interests, but also offers an additional opportunity to learn to respect and trust another person. The ability to communicate becomes an excellent tool and indicator of the degree of socialization of a child. It is in communication that a child learns to communicate fully on equal terms, which is also possible in child-parent relationships.

1. Use your own example to show how to communicate with other people.

2. Tell your child who a friend is, who an acquaintance is. Why are they friends?

3. Visit the playground in the courtyard with your child, as it also acts as a territory where children learn to communicate in a communication situation.

4. Have various conversations at home with your child about the need to be able to listen to others, sympathize with them, empathize if something bad happens, and try to help.

5. Develop masculinity and a gentlemanly attitude towards girls in a boy; modesty and femininity in a girl.

6. Visit people where there are small children more often. Looking at your communication with other children, the child will take an example from you.

7. Celebrate birthdays, invite friends your age from kindergarten and neighbor children to the holiday.

8. Do not always strive to be a mediator between your child and other children; allow him to be independent in his actions and actions.

9. Do not interfere in resolving children's conflicts too often. If you don't like your child's friend, you shouldn't interfere sharply in their relationship. Give him the opportunity to try to find the right way out himself. In most cases, kids themselves determine who is a good friend and who is a bad one. And the parents’ harsh answers: “I forbid you to be friends with him!” - will not bring the expected result.

9. Don't criticize your baby's friends.

10. Give your child freedom in choosing friends and acquaintances.

Dear parents, the formation of a harmonious personality depends on you! In order for your child to become an individual, you must follow the following recommendations:

Be more attentive to children;

Give your child more opportunities to meet his needs;

Be interested in his problems, delve into the complexities and help develop skills and talents;

Every child’s problem is serious, treat it with understanding;

Every preschooler needs a sense of self-worth. Listen to his opinion so that he feels his own importance;

Don't achieve success by force. Coercion is the worst option for moral education. Coercion in the family creates an atmosphere of destruction of the child’s personality.

Do not hesitate to emphasize that you are proud of him;

Evaluate the child’s actions, not his personality;

Accept your child for who he is. Remember that this is your child, he needs your love, care and support;

Restrain your possessive instincts and treat him as an equal partner who still has less life experience than you;

Try not to protect your child from the difficulties of life;

Strive for well-being in the family, so that he feels comfortable and has confidence in his parents;

Respect his right to his own opinion;

Always find time to talk to him.

Publications on the topic:

Enrichment of attributive vocabulary in older preschoolers with SLD during play activities. Guidelines Explanatory note. Adjectives play an important role in a child's mental and speech development. Conscious operation of this part of speech.

Recommendations for parents “Children’s conflicts and their solutions” From a very early age, the child wants to communicate with other children. But disputes and even fights often arise. Parents need to learn.

Recommendations for parents of preschoolers “How to teach a child to learn” HOW to teach a child to learn: Love of learning, desire and ability to learn are mutually complementary concepts. These are the three components of success.

Recommendations for parents: How to teach a child independence? How to teach a child independence? Probably every parent who has a small child asks this question. How can I help?