How to properly refuse a person’s request so as not to offend: competent phrases. How to refuse a person without offending him? How to refuse without offending

→ How to refuse a person without offending him?

“Anyone can offend an artist,” Andrei Mironov liked to say. He put a slightly different meaning into this phrase than the one revealed in this article. In this regard, it would be more appropriate to paraphrase this quote: “Everyone can be offended.”

Yes, very often we do not notice how we offend others with a careless word, gesture or movement, but such is life: we cannot adapt to the subtle spiritual world of everyone. In addition, in this world, unfortunately or fortunately, there is a harsh law: “Either you are his, or he is you.”

In any case, even if we abstract from lengthy reflections on the topic “Who lives well in this world” and think about how to please everyone, we must admit: each of us offends others much more often than we would like. This situation becomes even more uncomfortable if we offend a person by refusing.

Agree - everyone in life has had situations when someone asks for help, a request or a favor, but for some reason we do not want to fulfill this request or cannot. “Help me assemble the furniture”, “Please take your wife to the hospital - you’re driving a car”, “Borrow money before the advance payment” - these are the most trivial requests that we often hear from neighbors, friends or relatives.

And if someone cannot refuse in these cases simply for reasons of humanity or guided by the rule “all people should help each other,” then there is a category of people who, even if possible, refuse help.

Whether this is right or wrong is not for us to decide, moreover, each case can be considered from several positions. The main thing is how to refuse without offending the person asking?

Separately, I would like to examine the request to borrow money. It's sad, but this world, as well as human minds, is ruled by money. I feel sorry for those who deny this or STILL don’t realize it. Money is good and evil at the same time. It is substance, matter, religion and the purpose of life at the same time. That is why refusals of financial assistance are the most painful and unpleasant. Of course, you can simply answer that you don’t have that amount at the moment or refer to an upcoming repair/major purchase/vacation/utility payment, making it clear that you don’t currently have the opportunity to borrow.

The situation looks more piquant (there is no other way to describe it) if you have your own apartment, a car and a fairly high salary, and the person asking is aware of all this. Against this background, the refusal to borrow a couple of thousand rubles looks at least strange. At the very least, you will be immediately accused of being a “redneck” (of course, “behind your back”). How can you refuse in such a way that you “eat the fish and don’t wash the frying pan?” In other words, how to maintain friendly relations after a refusal and not offend the person?

No matter how strange and ugly it may look, in this situation you can choose a “bad” or “good” method. “Bad” - blatantly lie. So much so that the person asking feels guilty for asking you for money in the first place. Legends come up: “I flooded my neighbor, now I’m paying for an expensive Italian set by a court decision,” “My loan is overdue, if I don’t pay “n” money this month, they will judge me,” “Where were you before, I was only yesterday Sasha /Vasya/Petya lent everything he had,” etc. There are many options, but few will find this method ethical. Moreover, if a neighbor asks to borrow for treatment/funeral/mortgage payment, and you are going to go on vacation to the sea and the requested amount is critical for you.

The most optimal option in this case would be the following option. You refuse, but only partially. Yes, you will have to borrow some amount, but just one that will not greatly interfere with the accomplishment of your plans. At the same time, be sure to add that the person is asking for the funds you really need, and you help as much as you can. As a rule, your friend or acquaintance in this case realizes that you too may have your own affairs and problems on which you need to spend money. He may even feel ashamed, but in any case, he will no longer be offended by you.

Another life situation is refusal of help. For example, you might refuse to help your neighbor sort out the trash in the garage, citing a bad back or a migraine. But this is a “bad” way (see above). It's best to do the following.

Do not refuse help, moreover, show initiative, but offer conditions that are simply impossible to fulfill. For example, citing your busy schedule, offer to reschedule work on a day when your neighbor can’t. Or better yet, a week or a month in advance. In this case, the face needs to be given an expression a la “I would love to, but only now... but as soon as - so immediately!” Believe me: the neighbor will not be offended. Most likely he will answer: “Okay, don’t be upset that you can’t help. I’ll ask Vasya/Petya/Stas - he’s just on vacation, he has nothing to do.” Perhaps it will be ugly on your part, but this is not about how to refuse tactfully, but about how not to offend a person with a refusal. I think that it is in this case that you can sacrifice moral and ethical standards and bribe your conscience with a pie.

The last and most difficult type of rejection concerns... yes, relationships.

There is only one question here: how to refuse to date him/her/marry/befriend/sleep without offending him/her?

I can say that if someone wrote a kind of Bible on the topic of relationships, then there would not be a universal answer there. The only thing that can be said with confidence is how NOT to refuse so as not to offend. NEVER say the phrase “You are good, but I love you as a friend. Let’s remain friends.”

Dear ladies, if you only knew how this affects men! This is literally an indication of his inferiority and failure as a man. His first thought is “If I’m so good, then the one she wants to date is even better?!” Domination, sir. It just so happens that males always strive for dominance (or, if you prefer, phallometry). And with a refusal that implies “fuck you... into the friend zone,” you will never be able to count on friendship. But getting your share of retribution is quite possible. Insidious males are so insidious.

But seriously, if you do not want to offend a person by refusing him a relationship, there are two pieces of advice here. Firstly, if you really only count on friendship, exclude absolutely any manifestations of sympathy. Make friends the way guys make friends - sternly, sometimes rudely, and honestly. But if something goes wrong, and a simple acquaintance develops into something more, but you don’t want this, refuse categorically. No “friendship”, “I love you like a brother” and so on. Accurately and directly point out that the man has shortcomings, and ones that he can no longer correct - apparently, he stood in line for something else while God was giving away brains/beauty/hands/sense of humor.

The man will understand. He will understand and say “well, screw you...”. As you can see, there is no resentment. There is only aggression and the desire to look for someone who will appreciate him.

Concluding this article, I would like to summarize: despite inappropriate humor and sarcasm in such a serious aspect as refusal without offense, you cannot do without it. If you refuse, say what your conscience tells you. Sometimes you can lie, as described above, sometimes you can honestly name the reasons, not caring about grievances, you can even ask for something in return. But in any case, try to really understand the person, enter into his position, even sympathize, and then he, in turn, will understand that, it turns out, there is nothing to be offended about.

Many take advantage of your kindness, and when you refuse, they accuse you of complete selfishness and heartlessness? Living the way you want is not selfishness. Selfishness is when others should think and live the way you want.

There are many people in the world who are called trouble-free. You can contact them at any time of the day for help, and they will never refuse. Many consider this quality of their character to be a human virtue, because it is beneficial to always “have at hand” such a “no-failure” person in order to transfer some of your problems onto him.

However, rarely does anyone take the trouble to think: maybe a person simply cannot refuse?

People who cannot say “no” often do not have enough time for their own affairs and personal lives, although they can, at best, count on a dubious compliment as gratitude for their reliability.

A striking example of a reliable person and what the inability to refuse leads to is the old film “Autumn Marathon” with Oleg Basilashvili in the title role. The hero of the film is not young, but he never learned to refuse and live the way he wants. His life was almost over, but he never became a person because he always lived the way others wanted.

Reliable people always, like a magnet, attract people who actively take advantage of their inability to refuse. We can say that the executioner is looking for a victim, and the victim is looking for an executioner. And even if the “non-refusal person” suddenly rebels and refuses to play the role of a lifesaver, he will immediately be accused of complete selfishness and heartlessness.

There are golden words that everyone should remember: “Living the way you want is not selfishness. Selfishness is when others should think and live the way you want.”

Why are people afraid to say no?

People who fulfill other people's requests against their wishes most often have a soft and indecisive character. In their hearts, they really want to say “no,” but they are so afraid of embarrassing or offending another person with a refusal that they force themselves to do something that they do not like at all.

Many people later regret what they once wanted, but were unable to say “no”.

Often, when people refuse, they say the word “no” as if they feel guilty about something - it seems to them that some kind of unpleasant reaction will follow. Indeed, many are not used to being rejected, and “no” causes a negative reaction in them - they are rude, break off relationships, etc.

Some people don't say “no” for fear of becoming unwanted and being left alone.
How to refuse politely?

By saying “no,” we often make enemies for ourselves. However, it is worth remembering that what is more important for us is to offend someone with a refusal or to take upon ourselves the fulfillment of obligations that burden us. Moreover, it is not at all necessary to refuse in a rude manner. For example, the same diplomats try not to say “yes” or “no,” replacing them with the words “Let’s discuss this.”

When saying “no”, it is worth remembering that:

this word can protect against problems;
can mean “yes” if pronounced hesitantly;
successful people say “no” more often than “yes”;
by refusing what we cannot or do not want to do, we will feel like a winner.

There are several simple ways to politely refuse, which show that anyone can do this task.

1. Outright refusal

Some people believe that when refusing something, you must give a reason for the refusal. This is a misconception. First, explanations will look like excuses, and excuses will give the person asking hope that you can change your mind. Secondly, it is not always possible to name the real reason for the refusal. If you invent it, the lie may later be exposed and put both in an awkward position. In addition, a person who speaks insincerely often gives himself away with his facial expressions and voice.

Therefore, it is better not to fantasize, but simply say “no” without adding anything else. You can soften the refusal by saying: “No, I can’t do this,” “I don’t want to do this,” “I don’t have time for this.”

If a person ignores these words and continues to insist, you can use the “broken record” method, repeating the same words of refusal after each of his tirades. There is no need to interrupt the speaker with objections and ask questions - just say “no.”

This method is suitable for refusing aggressive and overly persistent people.

2. Compassionate refusal

This technique is suitable for refusing people who tend to get their way with their requests, causing pity and sympathy. In this case, it is worth showing them that you empathize, but cannot help.

For example, “I’m very sorry for you, but I can’t help you.” Or “I see that it’s not easy for you, but I can’t solve your problem.”

3. Justified refusal

This is a fairly polite refusal and can be used in any setting - formal or informal. It is suitable both when refusing to older people and when refusing to people occupying a higher position on the career ladder.

This refusal assumes that you give a valid reason why you cannot fulfill the request: “I can’t do this because I’m going to the theater with my child tomorrow,” etc.

It will be even more convincing if you name not one reason, but three. This technique is called failure for three reasons. The main thing when using it is the brevity of the wording so that the person asking quickly grasps the essence.

4. Delayed refusal

This method can be used by people for whom refusing someone’s request is a psychological drama, and they almost automatically respond with consent to any request. People of this type often doubt that they are right and tend to endlessly analyze their actions.

Delayed refusal allows you to think about the situation and, if necessary, seek advice from friends. Its essence is not to say “no” immediately, but to ask for time to make a decision. This way you can insure yourself against rash steps.

A justified refusal might look like this: “I can’t answer right now because I don’t remember my plans for the weekend. Perhaps I have arranged to meet someone. I’ll need to look at my weekly planner to confirm.” Or “I need to consult at home,” “I need to think. I’ll tell you later,” etc.

You can refuse in this way to people who are assertive and do not tolerate objections.

5. Compromise refusal

Such a refusal can be called a half refusal, because we want to help a person, but not completely, but partially, and not on his terms, which seem unrealistic to us, but on our own. In this case, it is necessary to clearly define the terms of assistance - what and when we can and what we cannot.

For example, “I can take your child to school with mine, but just let him be ready by eight o’clock.” Or “I can help you do repairs, but only on Saturdays.”

If such conditions do not suit the requester, then we have the right to refuse with a calm soul.

6. Diplomatic refusal

It involves a mutual search for an acceptable solution. We refuse to do what we don’t want or can’t, but together with the person asking, we look for a solution to the problem.

For example, “I can’t help you, but I have a friend who deals with these issues.” Or “Perhaps I can help you in another way?”

In response to examples of different refusal techniques, one can argue that it is necessary to help people and that by refusing others, we ourselves risk finding ourselves in a difficult situation where we will have nothing to count on anyone’s help. Note that we are talking only about the requests of people who are accustomed to “playing with one goal”, believe that everyone is obliged to them and abuse the reliability of other people.

Many people are completely unable to refuse, while others skillfully take advantage of this, turning into manipulators. It is not right. You need to learn to refuse competently and politely, but at the same time firmly and unambiguously.

Before learning how to refuse, it is worth finding out the reason why people do not know how to refuse and fulfill every request, although this greatly interferes with their life. Most often, people are afraid to say no because they are not sure that the friendship will survive after a refusal. This is a completely wrong position, since through constant self-sacrifice it is impossible to earn either friendship, much less respect.

How to politely refuse someone

There are three main refusal techniques, which will be discussed in detail below.

Refuse without saying no

Sometimes, the simpler and more accessible the response to a request is formulated, the faster the futility of his demands will become clear to the petitioner. A simple refusal consists of saying the word “no.” However, for many it is difficult to refuse directly, or the chain of command does not allow this. In these cases, it is worth using the soft refusal technique.

Soft refusal

The use of this method allows us to somewhat smooth out the severity of the refusal. To politely refuse people, at the first stage it is necessary to show attentiveness and courtesy to the applicant. If his question is not entirely clear, it is necessary to clarify everything he did. What if there is still an opportunity to help him? If this is not possible, then you need to gently say that this matter is in the competence of another person, and you do not have time and you will not be able to help. It is definitely worth emphasizing that if you refuse, you are very sorry. You need to prepare for the fact that the petitioner will begin to press for pity or threaten. In this situation, under no circumstances should you enter into controversy, but only repeat the refusal.

Mixed failure

This method is somewhat reminiscent of the technique of working with customer objections when selling. Using this method, you can repel even the most capable manipulator. The only condition is complete calm during the conversation and a firm intention to defend your point of view. When communicating with a persistent petitioner, it is very effective to repeat his last phrases - this is one of the methods of how to refuse without saying no. The thing is that repetitions make it clear to the manipulator that the refusal is not due to the fact that the person did not understand the request.

When you refuse, you must always remember that by making such a decision, you are only defending your own opinion, and are not violating anyone’s rights at all.

How to refuse a request

Sometimes it is very difficult for us to refuse a person, especially when he insists on your help. You are faced with a choice: refuse, offending the person, or fulfill the request, but end up with a lot of difficulties and problems. At the same time, quite often we choose the second option, and, going out of our way, fulfill the person’s request.

If the person asking is offended by you for refusing, think about why he is doing this. There are times when someone does you a favor and then expects you to reciprocate. Moreover, his request is actually a demand, which is dressed in a request only out of politeness. This is a very difficult situation, so try not to get caught in such difficult situations, and never ask a person for a favor if you know that he may demand something in return soon. In such cases, you can offer the person some kind of alternative, that is, help in a different form.

If a person asks for something too persistently, then, as a rule, this is an ordinary manipulator. Basically, such people are not capable of providing assistance, and in principle you cannot expect any serious services from them. Perhaps you have already helped him once, so he turns to you again. And if you fulfill his request this time, he will ask you again and again and again ad infinitum.

You may not explain the reasons for the refusal, this is your right, but, unfortunately, very often the person asking begins to argue with you, you may even lie, which is unpleasant, just to finish this question. There is no need to sit and make excuses to the person, just say that you cannot fulfill his request, and that’s it.

If it is inconvenient for you to refuse, but you are also unable to fulfill his request, then you can offer to help the person asking to resolve the issue differently. Be sure to start the conversation with the fact that you would really like to help him, but given certain circumstances, you cannot do this now. But you can help in another way, and you will be happy to do so. Perhaps such a refusal will be received positively, and you will not ruin your relationship with this person.

Remember, no one has the right to force you to do anything. If you decide to refuse a request, refuse boldly, perhaps this person will be offended by you later, but you need to choose what is convenient for you - survive this person’s offense or get a lot of problems and troubles.

How to refuse a manager

Is your manager burdening you with a lot of extra work? How to prevent yourself from being taken advantage of without getting fired? How to refuse a manager? Most employees ask themselves these questions at least once in their lives. It turns out that you just need to learn to say “no.” If at the very beginning of your work you let your boss know that you know how to refuse, then in the future he will not have the desire to burden you with tasks overtime.

It is necessary to understand the reasons for this behavior of your manager. Look around. Do your colleagues stay late after work or does your boss consider you the weak link? In the first case, you need to choose: whether to join the workers or leave the company, since going against the team will be difficult. Perhaps he decided that you simply could not refuse him. And with all this, he does not doubt your professionalism and, perhaps, considers you one of the best. He would hardly entrust an important job to a bad employee.

Having established the reason, you may well demand a promotion or increase in your salary. The manager himself must take care of this, but practice shows that this happens extremely rarely.

As if casually, ask whether the additional load will be paid. You should show your manager that you respect yourself and your work and will not work for free. Therefore, when you are burdened with additional work, ask what additional payment you will be given after completing it.

Do not under any circumstances show your fear in front of your leader, he is the same person as you, and, undoubtedly, you can also come to an agreement with him. Refuse to work overtime by reminding your manager of your employment contract, which carefully outlines your work schedule.

It is possible that the boss does not remember that some type of work is not part of your job responsibilities. Tell him about this in a polite manner, and most likely the incident will be resolved. Refusing is not as difficult as it seems.

To refuse your manager, explain to him the next time he approaches you with a request that you are already busy with work, and the additional workload may affect quality. It is possible that for him at the moment it is more important to complete the work with which he approached you, and current tasks can be postponed.

If you fail to find a common language with your manager, and you still don’t know how to refuse the manager, then in the end, the light has not converged on one organization. Leave this place.

You need to be able to say “no” so that a person is not offended. For some people, this is a whole problem; they begin to “walk in circles,” thus ending up in an awkward position. But this skill can be developed and it is not difficult. The main thing is to know a few simple rules, following which you will no longer doubt how to politely refuse someone.

Why are we afraid to say “no”?

Our life is communication, we constantly contact each other and help. But there are situations when it is inconvenient to fulfill a person’s request. That’s when doubts begin, you are tormented by a feeling of guilt that you put your interests above others. But, if you think carefully, you could fulfill the request, within reason, of course.

The root of the problem lies in your insecurity. Usually It is precisely insecure individuals who experience such difficulties. They forget that help is voluntary. It seems to them that if they ask, then they have to give up everything and give up their principles and deeds. This is not quite the right approach, when you don’t have the opportunity - you can safely disagree.

This in no way compromises you or offends the one who asks. You just have to be able to present a refusal. To do this, you just need to try a few times, and then a habit will develop. You should start with a small stock of template phrases that can be used in frequently encountered situations.

How to politely refuse someone?

The main rule of successful people is not to say the words “yes” and “no”. They must be replaced with phrases that They will definitely make it clear about the refusal and immediately explain the reason:

“I don’t want to do this”;
"I have no time";
"I dont have an opportunity".

However, if a friend, boss, relative asks you, use other options, a reasonable “no” or a diplomatic one.

It is assumed here stating the reasons and suggesting a possible alternative:

“I can’t do this because I’m working, maybe there will be a minute later”;
“I will take your child to school if he is already dressed and waiting outside”;
“We can repair the car, but on Saturday.”

There are suitable words for all occasions, they just have to be intelligible and to the point.

How to politely refuse a man?

This is a common problem. It all depends on who he is to you. Is he just hanging out on the street or is it a friend talking about his feelings, maybe an ex-boyfriend who has decided to return.

Let's start with annoying strangers, it’s easier with them, you can safely lie:

"I'm married";
“I don’t have time right now, here’s my phone number” (you give him the wrong number);
“Tell me your number, I’ll call you back.”

If the gentleman does not understand, act firmly and confidently, but politely:

“I don’t intend to get to know each other and date, is that clear?”;
“I’m not in the mood to communicate with absolutely anyone right now.”

You can speak more frankly with your ex, but without flirting, but seriously and intelligibly:

“We had a lot of good things, let me leave only these moments in my memory”;
“Let’s not rush things, maybe I’ll change my mind, but not yet”;
“You are very good, it’s too much for me. I want to find someone less wonderful."

And you have a completely different conversation with your friend.

How to politely refuse to meet a guy?

You don’t want to break ties with him, but he is dear to you in this particular capacity. And yet don't go in circles, but speak directly looking into your eyes:

“I love someone else, but I need you, try to understand”;
“I’m not in the mood for intimacy right now”;
“Maybe later, now I need to sort myself out.”

Try to avoid common mistakes:

Don’t waste time, explain yourself as soon as you see the need;
Do not flirt, as you are giving vain hope;
Be specific, explain clearly and clearly.

Perhaps you need to leave your friend for a while and not communicate. Your constant flashing in front of his nose will tug at the wound. Try not to catch his eye, let him rest and forget.

Original ways to say no

Sometimes nothing helps, a person does not understand normal words. You'll have to use cunning:

Move on to a conversation about money. Ask the fan about his salary, where he works and who he works for. Then show your dissatisfaction with a small salary or an inexpensive car. Sigh languidly as you pass jewelry displays;
Pretend to be a stupid chatterbox, guys don't like them. Tell him what you discussed with your friend yesterday about cosmetics, dresses and a handsome neighbor. Don't let us get a word in;
Openly ignore its existence. On a date, answer his questions randomly, call your girlfriends and mom while walking with him in the park;
Tell us what a big family you have: five children, a bedridden mother and an elderly grandfather. Nobody needs such a convoy.

One of these options will definitely frighten an annoying man; miracles do not happen.

How to politely refuse a service to a client?

Sometimes you come across such active clients that they simply don’t let you work. They need to be able to say “no” without being rude or aggressive.

Use delaying phrases, they will gain time:

“Unfortunately, at the moment the specialist on this issue is busy, as soon as he becomes available he will contact you”;
“Yes, we understand your problem and will try to solve it as soon as possible. If it doesn’t work out, we’ll call you back”;
“Thank you for contacting us, we value your time, so we won’t delay any longer and will contact you with the results”;
“Unfortunately, you are mistaken, our company does not do this, but I can give you the phone number of another company.”

Do not say “no” openly, otherwise the person will think that he was simply rejected. Apologize, spend a couple of minutes with him, and if possible, offer an alternative solution. Main - Don’t lie and let them feel attentive.

If you understand that you are experiencing difficulties in communication, create a few template phrases that will help you out in difficult times. Of course, they are not suitable for every case, but you will become more confident not knowing how to politely refuse, having at least something in your arsenal.

Video: we carefully and politely refuse

In this video, psychologist Igor Kolokoltsev will talk about really working ways to politely but firmly refuse a person, and how to do it so that he does not harbor a grudge against you:

It's impossible to deny: rejection is very unpleasant. However, it is part of life. Whether you're getting your heart broken, rejected for a job, or simply let down by a loved one, emotions will always be unpleasant. Such situations never pass without problems, it is always uncomfortable. If you yourself want to refuse someone, you also have a hard time. You need to behave tactfully, support the person and at the same time cope with your own negative emotions. If you fail, you make the rejection even more painful. Many people would like to be able to refuse gently and politely. You don't want to hurt the other person, make them feel pain and disappointment. It's all so complicated! Fortunately, there are some tips that can help you cope with such moments in life as gently as possible.
It could even be a completely positive experience! Sometimes a refusal becomes an impetus for change, because a person begins to think about how to become better. Rejection makes you think more about yourself. This is a kind of motivation that helps you move on. If you need to turn someone down, use the tips below. This will make the situation more comfortable for everyone.

Tell the truth

This may seem obvious, but it is important to know that if you deceive a person about the reason for your refusal, you are not making their situation any easier. Some people prefer to lie in order not to hurt the feelings of the person being rejected. This is a good intention, but this behavior does nothing to soften the blow. Honesty is your best choice, don't try to sugarcoat anything. Even if you think that lies can be for salvation, do not give in to such thoughts. The truth hurts, but then it is easier to accept, and a lie softens the effect only in the first minutes of the conversation, but ultimately poisons all the sympathy that remains after refusal.

Be precise

General words are of no use. If you must refuse someone, be as precise and specific as possible. In the future, this will only help the person who has received a refusal. Often, a refusal, no matter what the reason for it, is perceived as a personal insult.
The more accurately you can explain what caused the current situation, the better the person will understand that it is not his personal fault. This is a very important point for both sides of the conversation. Think through your rationale in advance so that you can present it as clearly and intelligibly as possible. This will help you reduce your own stress during failure.

Watch your tone

Don't forget that the problem may not only be what you say, but also how you say it. Think about how the other person would feel in such a situation and try to behave accordingly.
The tone of your voice and the timing of your conversation are the most important characteristics, so remember that it's not just about the words you choose. Of course, they are also of great importance, but we should not forget about other criteria. Do breathing exercises, try not to strain, and watch the intonation of your voice. By paying attention to this, you reduce both your own stress and the other person’s discomfort.

Accept your role

If you are also somehow involved in the current situation, be sure to tell the person you are breaking up with. If the blame doesn't fall solely on his shoulders, the situation becomes a little more comfortable. Share the blame if this is the actual state of affairs, because the refusal is based on explaining the real situation. This will help you clearly explain the reasons for your decision, although at the time of the conversation it will be difficult for your interlocutor to perceive everything rationally and without unnecessary emotions. This is understandable, as breakups can be extremely draining. Be prepared for this, accept in advance the fact that negativity is inevitable and you are partly associated with it.

Consider a compromise

If the situation allows, you may not need to harshly refuse the person. Sometimes a problem can be resolved through compromise. If you start a conversation with the goal of getting your point across and getting what you want, it's quite possible that the other person will be able to meet you halfway. In this case, he will feel much more comfortable.
In such a situation, no one can emerge victorious, but it is important to come to an agreement and set the necessary boundaries. This is the most important thing because otherwise you will not be able to understand what is bothering the other person and how he will accept rejection. In any case, it is clear that this will be unpleasant. Learn to look after your own interests without hurting other people. This is a very important skill that helps you cope with rejection much more comfortably.

Practice in advance

If you're nervous about turning someone down and want to make sure your words, intonation, and expressed emotions are appropriate, you might want to practice thinking about what you'll say and how you'll say it. This will be extremely useful for you. For example, you need to fire someone. Practice how you would break bad news to another person. When you actually need to do this, you will already know that you can say it calmly, and then you will be able to express all your thoughts in a harmonious way, honestly and carefully, which will help the other person understand that life is not over, everything is okay. You will be able to do what you have to do, but in the most optimal way possible. Enough practice is very beneficial for both you and the person you are refusing. You can also practice with a friend or loved ones. In this case, you can get an outside assessment of your behavior and ask for useful advice. This will help you understand the intricacies of the situation even better and learn to behave as correctly as possible.

Don't expect a clear conclusion

Naturally, you would like to get some relief after a difficult conversation, but the situation does not always end this way. This is completely normal. Many people dream that the refusal will be positive and painless for everyone, but you should immediately understand that your interlocutor will not be happy. Just don't rush, don't push his emotions, don't try to cheer him up when it's inappropriate. By setting yourself up for the situation to be resolved immediately, you are setting yourself up for disappointment. You shouldn't do this! Be prepared right away that your conversation will not give clear consequences.

Rejection is hard

It is important to always remember that the best way to refuse a person is to behave with maximum attention, kindness and respect. Behave the way you try to behave in other situations. You may encounter some resentment and anger along the way, however, if you are kind, everything will work out as best as possible for everyone.